I was tagged by Corporate Presenter to produce my 2007 predictions.

Here they are (I may add a few more in another post) :

1. Gordon Brown will be unsuccessfully treated by Paul McKenna to stop his tongue-in-jowl acrobatics habit.
Number 11 Spinmeisters will attempt to turn a negative into a positive and launch a Gordon Brown branded line of chewing gum.

2. Tony Blair questions his faith when he realises the voice of God he has been listening to comes from a flat panel speaker concealed inside an autographed Bee Gees gold disc given to him by Laura Bush.

3. The Bee Gees become a trio again, Cliff Richard replacing Maurice Gibb. The group renames itself to ‘TB’s Freebies’.

4. Tony Blair converts to Catholicism and takes out a long lease on a confessional in an Islington church.
Cherie gets planning permission to convert the confessional into two micro-apartments and (fortuitously) sells at a 75% net profit one day before the property crash which her husband predicted would never happen.

5. Cherie Blair doubles her speaking fee when she changes her business model to charge by square footage of the mouth rather than time spent talking.

6. Cherie Blair and Procter & Gamble fight it out in the courts after Cherie changes her speaking-tour stage name to Oral-B.

7. Tony Blair retires and has three letters appended to his name by The U.S. Government - NLU (No Longer Useful). His application for a Green Card is refused.

8. The Independent continues its pioneering new media policy, buys two Caxton Presses from David Dickinson and reverts to broadsheet.

9. The Independent finally publishes an apology for giving away free glow-in-the-dark posters at the height of the Litvinenko radioactive poisoning affair.

10. After a dreadful showing in the Scottish elections, the Scottish Conservative Party changes its logo to a Bonsai tree.

11. Armando Iannucci cites exhaustion and ‘drought of any more funny ideas’ as the key reasons for his resignation as David Cameron’s policy advisor.

12. Wallsy, a radical street artist, runs about Bristol and Shoreditch painting brick patterns over Banksy’s artwork.

13. Menzies Campbell beats David Blaine’s record for hanging around near The Thames and doing absolutely nothing.

14. The noose used to execute Saddam Hussein will turn up on ebay.

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